Celebrating 40 years of friendship

It was nothing other than fate that brought Debra Kodama (‘85), Lori Bolin (‘85), Lisa Gates (‘85), and Liana Koeppel Taylor (‘85) together when they joined the San Diego State University speech and debate team in 1984. Little did they know that this decision would catalyze a lifelong friendship spanning over 40 years.

During their junior year in the spring of 1984, Kodama, Bolin, Gates, and Koeppel Taylor, all speech communication majors, independently decided to join the forensics team to study under Paul Gaske.

After spending countless trips piling up in cars and traveling to places such as Arizona, Riverside, and San Luis Obispo, it became clear that the four women had an undeniable bond. One of the funniest moments from the team is when Bolin and Gates were paired as debate partners with no experience. 

“They went up against a senior team from USC, two guys who were on debate scholarships,” said Kodama. “It was a horribly intense, stressful, awful experience for Lori and Lisa because they had no idea what they were doing. But, in the end, we all had a good laugh about what a ridiculous situation it was!”

It wasn’t long after the spring semester ended that Kodama, Bolin, and Gates became roommates for their senior year. While Koeppel Taylor was not an official roommate, she certainly earned the title becauseshe spent more time at their apartment than her own. The four went on to graduate together from SDSU in 1985.

“We have been close ever since. Through the years, we’ve been through marriages, births of children, deaths of parents, and divorce,” said Kodama.

However, it wasn’t just the four of them that were brought together by the SDSU Forensics team. Gates met her husband, John Gates (‘85), through the team, and the two have been together ever since. While on the team, he met his best friend and now business partner, Steve Williams (‘84). Together, they are partners in Avion Consulting, an executive coaching firm named in tribute to the street Gaske lived on before his passing in 2013. 

Everlasting Traditions

While the group may not all live in San Diego anymore, getting together and maintaining the friendship has been a top priority for all four. 

Their first group tradition started in 1984 when Bolin was at SeaWorld as a tour guide and received a free turkey as part of a staff appreciation gift. With lots of guidance from Kodoma’s mom, the four roasted the turkey and hosted a holiday dinner with their significant others — this started their tradition of an annual “Christmas Party.” For the past 40 years, the group has only missed the tradition one time in the late 1990s and the party has expanded to include all 10 children. 

The friends also participate in an annual “Roomies Weekend,” where they catch up, have serious and fun conversations, play games, and have a good time together. 

Their newest tradition is an annual trip to the Pacific Northwest. Koeppel Taylor and her husband, Matthew Taylor, have a home in Ocean Shores, Washington, where the group has been going for a summer getaway. 

Family by Choice

All four ladies can confidently say that this friendship has changed their lives all because they decided to join the forensics team. 

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"The importance of these friendships can't be understated. Our kids recognize the rarity and strength of our long-term friendships. For decades now, our children refer to us as their aunties and uncles,” said Gates. 

When Kodama went through chemotherapy for breast cancer seven years ago, Bolin, Koeppel Taylor, and Gates were some of the first people to come and keep her company while she recovered. Or when Bolin's son was in the hospital, they all took turns holding her hand in the ICU. 

“None of us have sisters, only brothers. So, we believe we are sisters by choice. And love,” said Kodama. 

From SDSU's lecture halls and countless road trips to their early career challenges, triumphs and trials of their personal lives, they have built a family rooted not in blood but in choice and unwavering love. Their story is a testament to how SDSU fosters relationships that extend far beyond the classroom, creating a lasting community where lifelong friendships are born and nurtured.